Playing A Game Killer Is Dead X360

For months, I wasn't just disinterested in returning to Killer Is Dead; I was afraid to. Afraid that it would confuse and aggravate me even more than before. Afraid that it would amount to a third strike against the auteur who, once upon a time, delivered some thrillingly cohesive and entertaining games. Even when I came back to it about a month ago, I had difficulty convincing myself to follow through. It was only a few days ago that I finally got into a light "groove" with the game -- but now I'm washing my hands of it entirely, after a bullshit death in Episode 9 forced me to replay an unreasonable amount of level. Twice.

Aside from the sword combat - which is mostly good - everything else about Killer Is Dead is just poorly-done. The camera is a travesty, getting stuck on almost everything in the game world, and frequently concealing enemies who are actively attacking Mondo. The shooting mechanics are abysmal, and featured just frequently enough to be irritating. Some (not all) bosses can only be defeated by exploiting indecipherable weaknesses. The currency/point system for health, blood, and upgrades is unnecessarily arcane. Many levels feature slow-moving, uneventful walking segments. Some levels are jarringly brief, and some others are bafflingly long, especially when they include inscrutable puzzles. The "gigolo" levels are just stupid, somehow dull and frustrating at the same time. Cutscenes seem to go on forever, and yet still don't manage to explain anything.

The shortcoming that finally got me to throw down my controller was the way that special and finishing moves use the "blood" meter. The blood meter is a valuable resource, allowing Mondo to heal and use other special abilities; but one critical use of blood is for a finishing move, which can either execute a weak enemy or finish off a worn-down, stronger enemy. The problem is that if blood has been depleted before or during a battle - such as, to heal - then the finishing prompt over a weakened enemy is unachievable. After a short time, the enemy will get back up and resume the fight; naturally, without enough blood to continue healing, the battle is likely to deteriorate from there. I feel like the game is taunting me for not having the prescience to save enough blood for a hypothetical finishing-move prompt.

(This is what happened both of the aforementioned times I was sent back to the beginning of the level after dying. And sure, there is an item that I could have used to revive immediately, but that just would have been a band-aid on a single encounter -- and a horseshit excuse for the game's obnoxious behavior.)

I went ahead and spoiled the plot for myself, because ... well, even if I had continued the game, I doubt I would have understood it. And, yeah: it's garbage. Like some amateur arthouse dreck, it gradually reveals a nonsensical backstory, while totally failing to develop its characters in any meaningful way. The only parts of the narrative that are actually worth paying attention to, are the standalone, monster-of-the-week episodes that don't link up with the main story at all.

At its best, during moments where the sword combat is working correctly, Killer Is Dead stands proudly next to No More Heroes/2. And occasionally, irrevently-humorous dialog will deliver some of that good old Suda feeling. But these experiences aren't typical. For the most part, Killer Is Dead is just badly made.

Better than: Flower, Sun, and Rain (at least there is some gameplay here)
Not as good as: Lollipop Chainsaw (whose "highs" weren't as high as Killer's, but which was much more tolerable on average)
Maybe not as good as: Killer7, but that's a chronologically difficult comparison to make.

Progress: Gave up during Episode 9.

Rating: Bad