Now, as one last, LAST trial...

The Champions' Ballad is a fun addition to Breath of the Wild, although its quality is somewhat uneven. The DLC's quest is essentially split into three segments, starting out pretty rough; then graduating to somewhere above mediocre; before finally finishing on a satisfying high note.

The first segment is centered around the ancient "One-Hit Obliterator" weapon, which can kill anything in one hit. But wielding it means Link will also die in one hit. And since the enemies come in groups, and have ranged attacks... yeah. It feels kinda bullshit.

Thankfully, not as much bullshit as the equipment-stripping handicap in The Master Trials, because you still have access to most of your old inventory -- critically: bows and arrows. For the non-masochist, the One-Hit Obliterator segment has little to do with the Obliterator, and a lot to do with methodical arrow-slinging.

Plus, there are only four encounters in this segment, and the game saves inbetween each one. So, yeah, not nearly as much bullshit as the Trial of the Sword.

The second segment has sub-quests that can be done in any order, each sub-quest consisting of minor assorted challenges and shrines, then a boss fight.

The miscellaneous challenges are purported to be the same trials that the Champions originally undertook, 100 years ago, which is definitely overselling them -- a few are "neat" but most are pretty "meh." In particular, the move-quickly-between-glowing-rings events are lukewarm and overused.

The shrines are good!, on par with the shrine puzzles in the original game. Between this DLC's first and second segments, there are 16 new shrines - not too shabby, right? - and I had just as much fun solving them as I did with the original 120.

Then there are the boss fights. These are re-treads of the same Divine Beast dungeon bosses from the main game: they use the same attacks, and have the same weaknesses. The difference this time is that you're locked into a limited set of weapons, so... no stockpile of gear, and no Master Sword.

But this hardly makes a difference for most of the bosses, as whaling away on them with the given weapons is still no trouble at all. (Waterblight Ganon was a big pain in the ass for me, but I didn't realize that you can use Stasis against his big dumb ice cubes.)

By the end of the middle segment's challenges and shrines and boss re-fights, I was feeling amicable about The Champions' Ballad - its shrines and other trials were more entertaining than not - but it still seemed a lot like recycled content. So, I was pleasantly surprised by the DLC's third and final segment.

A dungeon! That is, the same kind of large-scale puzzle-space as the Divine Beasts. Still smaller than a typical Zelda dungeon, but I found it really enjoyable in how it orchestrated multiple puzzle mechanics together in a visually-big way.

And the boss of this dungeon, a fuckin' magic zombie monk, was a thrill as well. Not just because of the shock of seeing the monk come to life, but also because of all the new (and remixed) attack patterns in his fight.

It did feel kinda silly how many times the monk kept saying that "this" trial was the "final" one, and I was almost a "true" hero! But by this late in the game, I wasn't holding out any hope for narrative quality.

If only Breath of the Wild's DLC had added more distinctive and substantial content like that.

The Champions' Ballad is ultimately satisfying, even though the majority of it - including some fairly blasé flashback cutscenes - is more of the same Breath of the Wild I'd seen before.

The real shame of it is, since the game's DLCs aren't sold separately, the "Expansion Pass" is functionally a $20 quest bundled with a bunch of other dumb shit that I didn't really want.

Also, the Master Cycle Zero looks rad but doesn't feel useful in practice. I think of it more like a cool trophy.

Better than: Borderlands 2: Mr. Torgue's Campaign of Carnage, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild - The Master Trials
Not as good as: Borderlands 2: Captain Scarlett and Her Pirate's Booty
And that finally wraps up Breath of the Wild: ... hey Nintendo, where all those new Switch games at?

Progress: Got the Master Cycle Zero.