Although The Tyranny of King Washington's second chapter "The Betrayal" doesn't have its predecessor's rude awakening, it still opens pretty rough -- the first three missions take about a minute each, and are framed with big blocks of mediocre dialog. This feeling of rushed, roughshod development becomes a running theme: the new spirit animal power, Eagle Flight (like a teleport-jump), is awesome when it works -- but proper targeting is prohitively difficult. Running and parkouring around Boston seems, more so than in the main game, too easily interrupted by unwanted climbs and incorrect jump directions. And the scenes where you encounter Ben Franklin come across like they were jammed in over a long lunch break.

Even though The Betrayal has open-world hijinks in town, rather than the snowy wilderness of The Infamy, I found myself just as disinterested in exploring and collecting this time. It might have something to do with the density of King Washington's hostile footsoldiers on the streets, who are always on the look-out for a half-dressed native with a wolf hide on his head. (As in The Infamy, one of the core game's features that's been trimmed from the DLC is the ability to reduce your notoriety.)

Although The Betrayal is theoretically a superset of The Infamy, it feels less polished overall. And like its predecessor, this chapter is also quite short, at about two hours of total mission content. We'll just have to see if the next and final "The Redemption" chapter lives up to its name.

Better than: Red Faction: Armageddon - Path to War
Not as good as: "The Infamy" opening chapter of Assassin's Creed III: The Tyranny of King Washington
When your "last time" intro cutscene is longer than some missions: You may have misallocated some development resources.

Progress: Finished the story, skipped the collectibles.

And so it ends, ... but not really. Heart of the Swarm resolves its own internal story, but its hints at StarCraft's deeper, more interesting plot are simply teased along to fit into the years-away Legacy of the Void expansion.

The final cutscene ties this campaign's subplot up nicely, but not nicely enough to wipe away the previous scenes' mistakes: poorly-framed melodrama, uninteresting Zerg-biology technobabble (xenobabble?), a cast of characters lacking any semblance of human relatability, and a mission where two characters literally push energy beams at each other, Dragon Ball Z-style. Back in the StarCraft and Brood War days, the backstory barely intruded into the game at all, and it's hard not to miss that here. The narrative between missions in HotS, more often than not, feels like wasteful filler.

The gameplay, thankfully, is as good as you'd expect from a Wings of Liberty follow-up with a few coats of polish. New Zerg units and abilities are fun to unlock and play around with, and there's a pleasant variety of mission types, including a couple really cool custom scenarios. The final missions are suitably large and satisfying, even if they are still on the "easy" side -- a sense that never really goes away throughout the campaign. Even in small-scale infiltration missions, the game seems to dump way more units on you than you really need, and getting even a handful of the optional unit and Kerrigan upgrades results in the scales being permanently tipped in your favor.

Heart of the Swarm's campaign is also slightly shorter than Wings of Liberty's, but in a sneaky way -- by the Campaign screen numbers, it has 27 missions to its predecessor's 26, but that includes seven micro-sized unit evolution missions (and excludes the three mutually-exclusive mission pairs in WoL). That being said, by the campaign's end, it feels like a pretty adequate length.

Kerrigan's quest introduces a number of cool new StarCraft concepts, and has enough clever mission designs to get by. While the experience as a whole is muddied by sloppy writing and awkward story direction, it's not so bad that a StarCraft fan would be turned away by it.

Better than: Anomaly: Warzone Earth
Not as good as: Sid Meier's Civilization V
Ultimately, not meaningfully better or worse than: StarCraft II: Wings of Liberty

Progress: Finished campaign on Normal.

After escaping Raynor's facility - and failing to reunite with him - Kerrigan's new-old mission is collecting strength for a revenge run against Arcturus Mengsk (yes, the same target she had back in 1998). The campaign narrative has offered a little more insight into the internal organization of the Zerg hive, which, wow, is incredibly dull. The Xel'Naga artifact from Wings of Liberty has barely been mentioned so far -- I'm hoping Heart of the Swarm doesn't push this plot point off for another three years. Kerrigan's personal journey is of more interest, but the dialog and scene scripting is still very underwhelming. Some of these lines are so terrible, it should be a crime to give them to as good an actress as Tricia.

The campaign's gameplay is, ... better, with a caveat. As per StarCraft standard, there's a great variety of mission objectives and mechanical twists, including the quirky, micro-sized unit-upgrade missions -- which are themselves part of Heart of the Swarm's collection of new virtual-dashboard content (along with Kerrigan upgrades and some story bits). The problem with this variety is that, so far, none of the missions have been even remotely challenging. Granted, I'm "only" on Normal difficulty, and I'm still in the campaign's early days, but so far the theme of the Zerg missions seems to be centered around the game's new "Select your entire fucking army at once" button. I really wish the story would unlock more units from the beginning, because right now I can't even force mechanical complexity into the missions.

I'm sure that this situation will improve before too much longer, but at the moment, considering the hours I've already spent in the campaign, I'm feeling pretty lukewarm toward it.

Progress: Finished Char (6 missions complete).

By far, my favorite part of Wings of Liberty was how the campaign applied drastic and awesome mechanical twists to the otherwise unsurprising StarCraft formula. Heart of the Swarm was long promoted as having even more unique twists in this regard, and ... I am still looking forward to them. Though I just got done complaining about how AC3 King Washington's first chapter failed to remind me how to play, Heart of the Swarm is really going out of its way to hold my hand, like I've forgotten how to click on things -- and so I'm still stuck in slow, remedial-level gameplay. I hope I can get to the interesting stuff soon.

But despite my meager progress so far, I already dislike the story. Gunpei almighty, this is one of the most melodramatic game scripts I've ever seen -- within minutes of the game's opening, Raynor and Kerrigan are acting like they've been ripped straight out of Gone With the Wind. What makes it worse is that the voice actors really give it their best; it would be a great performance, if any of the context was properly set. Come on, just shut up and show me the space opera already.

Progress: Finished the second mission.

"The Infamy" - the first of three parts in Assassin's Creed III's The Tyranny of King Washington DLC ... season ... thing - starts rough. It assumes you're starting it fresh on the heels, or even in the middle, of the core game: there are no in-game tutorial bits to refresh your memory on how to play. So if, like I had, you forgot how to counter and what techniques worked against which enemy types, you're going to get beaten around for a while.

The story, too, starts abruptly and awkwardly. This DLC story's alternate universe, where George Washington became corrupted by the power of the Piece of Eden, is introduced by Connor simply waking up into it. Connor, like the player, is surprised by the ways in which this world contrasts with the one he knows -- his mother is alive, Washington's men are killing civilians, and no one remembers the events that he does. (Actually, since he never met Achilles in this universe, he never even got the name Connor, and instead is only known by the tribal name that I couldn't possibly type correctly.) It's a neat angle in theory, but in practice, the series' weak scripting and acting chops aren't really strong enough to sell it. Instead of being drawn into the mystery of this historical anomaly, you're just strung along from setpiece to setpiece as usual, occasionally being reminded that Connor the protagonist doesn't really understand what's going on.

Thankfully, the actual gameplay mechanics in this DLC episode are solid, building on the strengths of the core game, and actually adding to them as well. Combat is still as fluid and brutal as before, and there's even a pocket-sized open-world map with side-quests and collectibles, although it doesn't open up until after a few introductory missions. But things really get interesting about halfway through, when you go on a spirit journey and gain wolf powers: the ability to summon spirit wolves (as you would assassins), and to turn invisible. This invisibility is immensely powerful, and dramatically changes the game of infiltrating enemy strongholds, but it also drains your health over time, meaning it must be attentively managed. The final mission introduces another wrinkle as well, in the form of search dogs that can smell through your cloak. The wolf cloak is a genuinely meaningful and satisfying mechanic, and feels like an organic fit with the alternate-history story, coming from tribal myth instead of Assassin myth.

So, The Infamy follows on the successful mechanics of AC3, and adds a new one of its own. But its story is lackluster, and short; ignoring the open-world collectibles, there are only six story missions, which you can wrap up in a couple hours. (Disappointingly, the final few missions are also the simplest and shortest.) The Infamy does enough right to be thoroughly enjoyable, but isn't quite substantial enough to be a runaway success.

Better than: Batman: Arkham City - Harley Quinn's Revenge
Not as good as: Grand Theft Auto IV: The Ballad of Gay Tony
But come on, Ubisoft: would it have been that hard to wait a few months and put out all three episodes as one DLC package? Releasing and selling The Tyranny of King Washington in three separate pieces is just confusing as shit.

Progress: Finished the story, skipped the collectibles.

Viking is separated into three sequential island maps, each of which must be gradually liberated. The story sequence after the first island was more interesting, more informative, and more understandable, than the game's opening scene. Despite including some in-game dialog that was cut off mid-sentence. It's a good thing that the game's storytelling is so scant, because otherwise there would just be more opportunities to see how terrible the writing and voice acting are.

The task of island liberation basically consists of a few phases: several instances of killing demon dudes to free a few vikings, a few instances of killing a bunch of demon dudes to free a camp, a couple instances of sieging a base, and a final siege to take the island boss. There are a handful of extra steps mixed in there, like collecting quest items to summon a dragon - which can then be used in the final siege, by picking something out of a menu for it to attack - but overall the routine is pretty rote. I got tired of it by the end of the first island, so, I'm not exactly looking forward to doing it twice more.

To its credit, the combat does get a bit more nuanced as you learn new moves, with e.g. combo points and shieldbreaker attacks. And the final siege on the first island, a multi-step affair with massive armies on either side, was pretty exciting -- though, still, too crowded with junk to really feel effective. On the one hand, I admire the technical implementation that puts so many actors on the screen at once, but on the other hand, who thought it would be a good idea to have the screen so dense that you can't even find yourself in it?

Viking is a somewhat cool idea propped up on a pile of half-baked execution. It's not the worst character-action game out there, but there are plenty better.

Better than: Golden Axe: Beast Rider (though not as hilarious)
Not as good as: Conan (2007)
Another cool quirk: Every time I exited the game, I had like a half-dozen Steam prompts (for launching Viking or its config app) waiting for me. I can only assume that the game executable failed to take window focus, and occasionally sent an Enter or Space or something through as input. Another victory for Sega's PC porting team.

Progress: Gave up -- Freed Niflberg

I remember Viking from back when I got my Xbox 360, and I was looking for budget and/or stupid games to fill my library. It didn't make the cut. So what is this 2008 console game doing, being re-released for PC, four and a half years later? My hunch is that someone at Sega had a standing contract to fulfill. Battle for Asgard has all the mechanical simplicity and lack of polish you'd expect from an early-generation title, but now with enhanced graphics settings (and somewhat ridiculous system requirements for those settings).

In many ways, Viking is - unsurprisingly - quite similar to standard character action games like God of War and Conan (2007). You're a big dude with big weapons, you run into demon enemies and hit them a bunch, there are combos and quick-time events, and you can collect currency items to purchase ability upgrades. Its unique selling point is your viking army, and the associated semi-open world; as you complete minor missions to save viking warriors and liberate encampments, you'll gain abilities and gather allies to storm larger enemy strongholds. During these sieges, you'll actually fight alongside your horde as you storm the enemy gates, which is a cool idea, even though the crowded screen can make it difficult to effectively target and tangle with your foes.

There's also a more-than-adequate share of basic execution problems. The game is missing a number of fundamental tutorial prompts; I didn't know you could climb vines, or jump, until I started mashing on things. You can only buy new items and abilities at certain map locations; there are fast-travel points, but you still need to stop what you're doing, find one, go get your stuff, then go back to the travel point before you can resume whatever activity you're on. And as I alluded to above, for a game that's (basically) from 2008, Viking has an unexpectedly hard time running on a modern PC with high graphics settings.

Oh, and like Binary Domain, basic control and graphics settings can only be changed in a separate configuration app. Keep up the great work, Sega.

Viking is kind of bad, but not completely bad. There is some enjoyment to be had in your gradual takeover of the map, and in the gloriously violent, decapitation-heavy executions -- I'll see how long that fun can hold up.

Progress: Lowered the drawbridge

I'll cut right to the chase: for a game driven by its narrative, and about a writer, Alan Wake could use better writing. The glimpses I've gotten of the larger story are good, and in fact, the game is fairly skilled at the art of visual storytelling. But the dialog frequently feels grammatically stilted, with critical ideas and emotions coming out in the wrong order -- and the voice acting often suffers from hurried delivery, making the characters feel emptier than they should. (The primary characters, anyway. Oddly enough, some of the background cast is actually quite strong.)

This may as well be the end of my post, because the rest of the production isn't nearly as significant. Aim a flashlight at a goon, then shoot him. Dodge to avoid death. Explore dark environs to find the way forward. All of these mechanics are mediocre at best, serving only to support the storytelling. So, yeah.

When I watched the "Night Springs" in-game episode about Quantum Suicide, and made the mental connection to Alan's disparate realities, I got really excited about the plot! So I was more than a little disappointed when the Wikipedia synopsis failed to reveal any science fiction slant. So much for finding Ken Levine's hidden inspiration for BioShock Infinite.

Sorry guys. I might otherwise consider soldiering on - like I said, the visual storytelling is actually very good - but with the size of my remaining backlog (and since I've found critical confirmation of my early impressions), I'm just going to let this one go.

Progress: Gave up -- finished Chapter 1

So it's been slightly over a year since I last picked up Super Mario 3D Land. I never abandoned it! Not officially, anyway. I got my 3DS updated, started the old girl up, beat a Shadow Mario chase stage, beat a Bowser time-limit stage, and ... now I am abandoning it.

The special world stages are like remixes of the original eight worlds - not identical, but pretty similar, and with mechanical twists like time limits and so on - which means they tend to feel just as short and insubstantial as the first time around. There is an undeniable joy in racing through one of these stages, but it's fleeting, and running around to collect star coins just isn't a meaningful-enough diversion. As much fun as I had beating the hell out of Super Mario Galaxy 2, there just isn't that much thrill in filling out this game's completion statistics.

This is a well-polished Mario, an enjoyable platformer, and impressively suited to short bursts of on-the-go play. But on the whole, the experience is shallower than any of the plumber's 3D adventures, and any of his post-Super Mario Bros. 3 sidescrollers.

Better than: New Super Mario Bros. ... I think. It's hard to remember.
Not as good as: Super Mario Galaxy 2
Still: probably one of the best bets on 3DS.

Progress: Complete(-ish), Special World 1

I really think I gave Binary Domain a fair shake -- but it's just too rough, too flawed, and too irritating.

To its credit, the game does have some fun boss designs, and the number and pacing of bosses is pretty impressive; of course, it would have to be, to break up the otherwise tedious generic-robot encounters. And even so, boss events can suffer from having too much shit happening, to the point where you can't even count the number of enemies and projectiles headed directly toward your face. It reminds me of Vanquish, but without the ability to get out of the way of your incoming death.

And as I mentioned last time, the high-concept plot is genuinely fascinating; but this fascination is diminished by wacky narrative pacing, and subpar dialog and voice-acting. Cutscenes are overly long, and while not as melodramatic as a Kojima production, are dull and plodding enough to ruin any hope of immersive storytelling. The poorly-polished relationship system doesn't help either, with plenty of irrelevant choices for responding to a teammate (such as "Yes," "No," or "Shit!"), and some completely illogical responses based on the characters' inscrutable personalities.

Also, I did part of a level where I had to ride a jet-ski through a sewage causeway. Well-placed mechanical change-ups are one thing, but with controls as bad as this ... the game can feel like it's parodying itself.

Between all these failings and frustrations - oh, and my teammates continuing to walk directly in front of my gun, then yelling at me for shooting them - continuing on through Binary Domain just felt like a chore. The final straw was unreasonably infrequent checkpoints. Dying isn't usually a concern, since you have a moderate store of life-restoring med-packs (and can usually get even more resuscitations from your teammates), but there are times when this doesn't apply, such as on the aforementioned jet-ski. In the mission I gave up on, I spontaneously failed, for no discernible reason, and with no apparent explanation; and was then sent backward about ten minutes. So, no thanks.

I no longer feel sorry for Binary Domain. While its basic ideas still strike me as promising, this isn't a game let down simply by a handful of execution mistakes; it seems to have gone wrong from the very start. You can do worse than this game, but it should be pretty easy to do better.

Better than: Terminator Salvation
Not as good as: Warhammer 40,000: Space Marine
Maybe a good thing I didn't use a microphone: since I spent most of my time cursing out the AI.

Progress: Gave up -- Chapter 2-5